Bored at work - the new epic thread

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Devious
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Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Devious »

Well....

thoughts?
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?! Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Yeah! YEAH! BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN! Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!

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Septih
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Septih »

My overwhelming thought is that you posted this in the wrong forum.
Devious
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Devious »

I am thinking about a new section just for bored at work. but... fixed
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?! Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Yeah! YEAH! BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN! Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!

Image
Greentitch
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Greentitch »

I thought that was what Off-Topic was for?
Devious
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Devious »

I felt that off-topic was too specific
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?! Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Yeah! YEAH! BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN! Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!

Image
Beckie
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Beckie »

Oh so you wanted to discuss wow..?
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Septih
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Septih »

Signing up to (maybe get selected to) be a beta tester for the new star wars mmo. It's running a system scan of my work PC. I'm totally gonna get selected to test it out on some weird graphics card.
ash
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by ash »

'HELP ALL MY DATA DISAPPEARED'
'Uh it looks like you changed your template to look at something different'
'Oh, let me call you back'
'....'
Greentitch
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Greentitch »

Septih wrote:Signing up to (maybe get selected to) be a beta tester for the new star wars mmo. It's running a system scan of my work PC. I'm totally gonna get selected to test it out on some weird graphics card.
Oooh cunning plan, I've got got a weird Nvidia card here.
Beckie
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Beckie »

I never ever get phone calls that are actually meant for me at work.. this is just an example from today.

Random Guy on Phone: Hi im from a depot, theres a supplier here to pick up an RTS, I need to know (x,y,z - I switched of at this point)
Me: Why are you phoning me?
Random Guy: You are the owner of the spreadsheet that I got sent from someone who is away on holiday today.
Me: Just because I wrote the program that makes the report your looking at doesnt mean I know what your on about.

Next Request:

Other random person: Hi, I havent been sent the week 19 dotcom numbers yet, can you please send them to me.
Me: I dont publish dotcom numbers, why dont you actually ask the person who does?
Person: Because I thought you would know why the other department hasnt sent it yet.
Me: I may be brilliant but reading minds isnt one of my skills (tbh I was a little less sarcastic)

Next Request:
Random#3: Hi I have been given some code by someone (that isnt me) but it doesnt work, heres the error message <<Attachment: Screenshot showing a tiny part of code & Error message (something along the lines of you do not have access to SIU playpen)>>
Do I say;
A: Why dont you ask the person who sent you the code
B: Why dont you ask the SIU team?
C: Why dont you ask the dwh support team?
D: I pretend to be the IT guy from CSI and say "I'll create a GUI interface in Visual Basic, see if I can track an IP address"

Discussing an applicant we had in to interview for a job:
Me: They have experience in C++
Collegue: Oh when I read that on their CV I thought that was the grade they got.
Me: And C#
Other Collegue: They play Music?

I dont actually have an IT support job btw.. infact technically I dont exist.

By not existing my department have instructions not to talk to me because I am far to busy...

.. although I probably didnt help myself by being far to helpful to someone last week. due to their temporary Internet files being full of junk when they opened spreadsheets it would 'repair' them by deleting the VBA. When I told them to talk to the helpdesk they sulked (our help desk is rubbish) and I ended up writing a .bat file to delete there temporary internet files (we dont have access to browse the folder they are in).
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Devious
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Devious »

Oh dear, poor becki!
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?! Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Yeah! YEAH! BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN! Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!

Image
ash
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Posts: 7146
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by ash »

'HELP MY OTHER DATA HAS DISAPPEARED TOO!'
'Did you change that template too?'
'Wait, let me call you back'...*click*
'fucks sakes'
Devious
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Devious »

New ASOIAF Book tomorrow! Awesome -

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Dance_with_Dragons
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?! Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Yeah! YEAH! BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN! Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!

Image
Septih
Rick Roller
Posts: 5136
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by Septih »

I have the others on my Kindle. Yet to get round to reading them as I'm rereading LOTR :P

On another subject, how much has everyone spent on the steam sale that finally ends today? I must be near £120
ash
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Re: Bored at work - the new epic thread

Post by ash »

0
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